Good day (or night), I am a recovering people pleaser. Yes, I said it. People pleaser. From early childhood all the way into my early thirties I wanted everyone to be happy, have everything that they needed and wanted, their way, on their schedule, etc. But, the strange thing is…drum roll please…I still wanted things too. I wanted to be happy, have the things that I needed and wanted, etc. Yet, I just oftentimes pushed myself to the back so that everyone else could be up front. Most of the time I doubt that anyone even realized what I was doing. That was just the way that it was. That was just me.
You would think that if I wanted everyone to be happy and I kept deferring to everyone else’s wishes and desires, essentially ensuring that they received what they wanted, then I would be happy. Right? Wrong! I was miserable. Yes, there were the occasional happy moments, but there was always an underlying sense of misery, disappointment, and invisibility. And that is no way for anyone to exist.
Thankfully, God had something much better intended for us. A plan that would allow us to give the love with which He so lavishly filled us to others, but also allow us to receive that love from others in return. In effect, seeing and being seen. His plan was Jesus. His only Son Who gave all of Himself as our Savior so that we in turn could receive all of Him and live the abundant life that God designed for us.
And as a part of God’s plan, we are called to live peace-filled lives, no matter the circumstances, no matter the environment, no matter the company. Paul expounds upon this in his letter to the church in Rome when he says, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” Romans 12:18 NIV. Now, living peace-filled lives does not equate to being a people pleaser. But it also does not mean that we hide ourselves in the barest cave avoiding people at all costs either. It simply means that we are to lead with love, God’s love, in everything at all times. And as we do that we will naturally become peace makers and peace seekers as God’s will becomes more important to us than having our own way.
Now, I know that some people out there are going to test us, rub us the wrong way, and maybe even try to incite us to riot. But, the good news? We are not responsible for other people. We are responsible for ourselves. And fortunately for us, we are whom God intends for us to control, not others. So, the next time that we find ourselves in a sandpaper situation, let’s remember that as far as it depends on us, we will seek peace. Be blessed. #sanguinemango
Sanguine Mango 